No next time

When a door is close, a window will open. But why does my life always like this. 

This morning, I applied at a call center company and was not able to get hired because I failed the final examination. If you are thinking how frustrated I am, it is not imaginable. But tomorrow is another day. I guess call centers are not for me. 

Looking back what happened this afternoon, I was stuttering when I had my call simulation. It is so funny thinking of it now. I never stutter. But I guess the pressure to find a job made me do so. It has only been four days since my graduation and I'm already stretching my bones again. My brain wants some rest. Okay, I gave in. I'll give you what you want. On another thought, maybe I'm just making excuses for my failure. 

Contrary to my last sentence, I still have a pending job at the publication. I still have an Art folio to get published. May be Mertle prayed that I would not get accepted. He wants me to finish my responsibilities before I go. Well, thinking of it, it is quite reasonable. I could have not finished schooling without the publication. But the publication would not survive either without me. Mutualism is perhaps the term for that. 

Decision making time, I've decided to stop applying for jobs for now. I need to focus on the publication first and for our upcoming Farewell Party for the staffers who graduated which basically includes me. 

But not able to get that job made me realize a lot of things, I feel really nervous in front of people, I always go to the CR, and most importantly, I have limitations. The reason for my rejection is for me to do better next time. And definitely, next time there will be no next time.